an adult film star's guide to foreplay: 7 tips from jessica drake

I wrote the following article for It originally posted on December 2nd, 2015:


I think foreplay gets a bad rap. It’s become cliché—even I’ve used analogies like “preheating the oven” and “warming up the race car before taking it out for record-setting laps.” Despite what we might see in adult movies, though, the reality is that foreplay is something we all need … not just women.
Here are the reasons why, along with some additional foreplay ideas that are outside the box.

Start the fun before you’re even together.

Foreplay builds excitement and anticipation. It can tease, or it can promise. We all like to feel desired, so when we get texts, emails, pictures, or phone calls from our lovers, we know they’re thinking about us. This tends to make us think about them. Make contact during a workday or when they’re out of town. You don’t even have to be in the same room (or the same state!) for foreplay to begin.

Have ‘brain sex.’

When you’re together, foreplay doesn’t have to start as overtly sexual. Sex is mental in so many ways, so appease your S.O.’s senses with an amazing meal, a glass of wine, and some conversation. If this isn’t something you do on a regular basis, it might seem forced in the beginning, but once you both relax, expect connectivity in shared conversation. I call this brain sex, and it’s some of my favorite foreplay.

To read my whole article, click here: