The Secret of Lingerie

Feminine, delicate, lace, faux leather, flirty, sexy – no matter what adjective you use to describe it, or what material your lingerie is made of – your choice of selection says a lot about you. Despite being a personal item most of the world isn’t privy to, just the simple knowledge of the black bra, matching panties and garter belt hugging the curves underneath your dress can give you an extra boost of confidence. When wearing new lingerie or intimates for the first time, a woman can’t resist adding an extra spring in her step or a switch in her hips. Plus, as an additional perk, your significant other will appreciate you, and the way your body looks, even more – adding spice to your love life and excitement to your bedroom games. After all, it’s often said that “a well tailored suit is to women what lingerie is to men.” Well, if your man turns you on in his suit, shouldn’t you want to return the favor?

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Regardless of your tastes or personal kinks, there are three lingerie staples that are classically perfect for turning your man on, and making you feel incredibly sexy. Read on to find out:

1) Black is the New Black: Black lingerie will never go out of style and it will forever be seductive, suggestive and erotic. When you add the mysteriousness of the color with the right materials – silk for example – it creates a wonderful aura of sexiness. Ooze it and own it.

2) Simplicity: We women love our straps, bows and fringes, but it’s its hard to get it on, it’ll be just that much harder to get it off. The former may be fine for days when you just want to admire yourself in all your finery, but for your honey’s sake – keep the removal process simple. You’ll thank me for it later.

3) Attitude: As I stated earlier in the post, a large part of wearing lingerie revolves around how it makes you feel about yourself. If you feel sexy, don’t be afraid to show it. Have fun in your boudoir wear. Your man will appreciate the extra spunkiness.

Whether red lingerie is your preference, or black, nude or even pink, the most important part is to buy pieces that make you feel both beautiful and comfortable. Experiment with a couple of different pieces, and have options that match your mood. You’ll be surprised at how a little piece of fabric can make you feel like a brand new woman. Have fun girls, and happy hunting.

xo,
jessica

Guide to Wicked Flirting – Tips for the Ladies

The days of being courted by a gentleman on your parents’ veranda, while sipping lemonade are long gone – though if you ask me, they may have never truly existed. As generations age, they cling on to romanticized or exaggerated notions of their youth, but I’m sure many people still met at a bar, saloon, or speakeasy, often flirting without the gaze of their parents.

What has changed is society’s notion of gender roles. While we are still far from total gender equality, if women are able to serve in the military, they sure as heck should be able to initiate flirting. If you’re the type of gal who typically waits on a guy to make the first move, but things in your dating life have been slow, then you may want to read this introductory Guide to Wicked Flirting.

Go to a bar alone… or any place for that matter – Starbucks, the movies, or a county fair. This may seem a bit awkward at first, but putting yourself out there can get you noticed. Empowered dating is all about exposing yourself and feeling comfortable even when you’re at your most vulnerable. Leave your friends at home, let down your guard, and embrace the opportunity to be yourself.

First find a spot in the bar (or place of your choosing) that allows you to interact with people. You can try bellying up to the bar and make friends with your bartender. Walk and talk with confidence. Put down your cellphone and focus on who’s in the bar. Smile, laugh, and strike up a converstaion with the strangers sitting near you. Browse the bar for a guy you find attractive. Make eye contact, and if he is too shy to approach you, move to where he is. Be friendly and engage in conversation. Start with “hello” – people forget how effective that one word is when breaking the ice.

Ask questions because us ladies aren’t the only ones who like to talk about ourselves. Once engaged in conversation, don’t clam up. If you come across someone you’d like to know better, take it slow — but try to keep the conversation going. Ask questions, smile, and pay attention to what they’re saying, and look them in the eye! Good eye conact shows the gentleman he is the most important thing in the room to you.

Ask him about his hobbies, favorite sports teams, and movies — and share some casual, but not too personal, information about yourself in return. Remember this is supposed to be fun, so relax and enjoy yourself! Conversation is a balancing act, but if you’re both enjoying it, you won’t even notice.

Be yourself – this may seem obvious, but some of the worst crash-and-burn stories you read in magazines like Cosmopolitan occur when someone is trying to put on a mask. Challenging yourself to act in a manner outside of the box is not the same as being untrue to you. Talk about what you’re passionate about. Even if he’s not into the same things, passion is contagious.

Everyone loves a mystery. Think of flirting as a foreword to the book of you. While you want to be yourself and converse freely, you also want to save some things to talk about for the first date… or perhaps for breakfast if things go really well that night. Leave him wanting more.

Give him your number. Few things are more attractive than a flirt who is confident, playful, and clever. If you like the time you’ve spent with this new man, give him your number. Don’t be shy, what’s the worse than can happen, he doesn’t call? It’s not the end of the world, but if you don’t try, you’ll never know where it can go.

Remember, if you sit back and wait for a man to do all of these things, you may spend the best years of your life doing just that, waiting. Take control and be the sexy, witty, best version of you, you can be!

xo,
jd

Food and Foreplay

Food and foreplay are two of the top items on my new-agey “gratitude list.” Although many of us occasionally overindulge in the first activity and neglect the second, the marriage of food and sex is a happy one. Whether it’s strawberries and champagne or Chinese take-out, your favorite foods can awaken a deep, carnal recess of your brain. The aroma and impromptu sloppiness will make you want to devour your partner’s genitals and the crumbs that happen to fall around them. Yes, I love eating.

You can forgo whipped cream, cherries, and chocolate syrup if they’re not your thing. I believe any food can get you horny, as long as you attribute some sort of a mythical power to it. For example, you may have good memories from childhood involving food, perhaps going to the mall with your friends and chowing down on a Cinnabon. Now if your partner brings home that sweet, nolstagic something and finger-feeds it to you, while also eating you out– INCREDIBLE. Your positive memories are now being associated with something even more stimulating, and you’re getting arounds physically and mentally!

Although my main advice for food sex is simple – eat food, have sex – here are things to consider:

Let go of being clean as possible. Just let go. There’s no avoiding a messy situation, especially since it’s half the fun. Lay a bed sheet over where you plan on fucking and throw it in the wash after the tasty deed. Then decide whether to take a shower or have more sex.

Get the good stuff. You and your partner are going to treat each other, so only prepare once-in-a-while foods. Their specialness or sinfulness will carry into the bedroom. Do you hardly cook for your partner? Turn your partner on by making her dinner, while playing sexy songs. Are you two a power couple on a low-carb paleo diet? Just once, in blood-oath secrecy, nibble on macaroons, chocolate cake, cotton candy, or a cinnamon roll. Also, foods that are “exotic” to you can transcend your normal sex routine to the unfamiliar. Highly aromatic foods, like Indian curry, foods that knockout all your taste buds, like a Dragon Roll, and slurpy foods, like Pad Thai or a ripe mango, are all scrumptious. The point is to be deviant and indulge like children on Halloween.

It’s also HOW you eat. Lovingly place your food anywhere on your partner’s body – on her tits, his dick, her vulva, or any other external hot spot are acceptable places. Make sure you or your partner’s genitals aren’t super irritable or prone to infection. Otherwise, lay food down from the waist up. Then, eat, lick, and nibble slowly until you both decide to rough it up. If you really want to make you partner happy, go down on them while they savor a bite of their favorite dessert. You can also sprawl small dry treats about your bed that you and your partner can taste while you two fuck (Cadbury chocolates have a low melting point!). However, unless it’s your kinky partner’s hands around your neck, be wary of choking.

Happy eating and sexing!

xo,

jd

 

jessica drake’s Guide to Wicked Sex: Fellatio Stills

Open your erotic potential with the help of this exciting, informative, and groundbreaking production. jessica drake takes a candid look at how men and women really feel about fellatio. With the help of three couples, youll see demonstrations that include basic positions, tips, technique, deep throating and even exploring the prostate. You can also watch with or without narration to help you improve on your own technique! So dont be shy, its time to discover the Wicked woman inside of youand with jessicas guide to fellatio, youll blow his mind and more!

Link: Guide to Wicked Sex: Fellatio

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Ask jessica: The Infamous G-Spot

Hi jessica, I’ve heard a lot about the infamous G-Spot, but I don’t know if I’ve ever had an orgasm from it. Help?

-Sarah, Sacramento, CA

Hi Sarah, you are not alone in feeling this way. You may even have experienced a G-Spot orgasm and not known what it was. Many women are curious about the G-Spot, but they don’t know what they are looking for. Here are some easy steps that may help.

Take some of your favorite lube and insert a finger or two inside yourself. Feel the warmth of all the different ridges and textures. Now curve your finger (or fingers) up towards your belly button to make that “come here” motion; search for a spot with a slightly different spongy feel- it will be about the size of a quarter. Experiment with different kinds of pressure on this area- stroking, tapping, rubbing. This may make you feel like you have the urge to pee, but if you keep going, you may just have an amazing G spot orgasm! The risk is worth the reward.

There are also toys made especially for G-Spot stimulation. Some of my favorites for hitting your sweet spot are:

  • Moka G-Vibe – As I was preparing for my “Guide to Wicked Sex: G-Spot and Female Ejaculation” instructional, I realized that while I had occasional G-Spot orgasms with a partner, I had never had one on my own.  I needed way more practice if I was going to be of any real help. Enter the Moka G-Vibe. Mine is purple! The slightly flat, yet still curved vibe is the right size and shape to stimulate your much sought after place. I recommend trying different angles and thrusting, or maybe even try dragging it across your G-Spot. I was glad I put towels down!
  • Love Handle G-Spot Vibrator from Evolved – There are many reasons why I love this toy – it’s the perfect size; it fits my curves; and there are 7 different functions. It’s not overwhelmingly big, and its handle is at the right angle, so you can easily reach your G-Spot (or someone else’s).

Now you’re ready for a little G-Spot self-love, or even with a partner. Sit back, relax, and enjoy the sweet G-Spot “O”! For more information check out jessica drake’s Guide to Wicked Sex G Spot and Female Ejaculation.

xo,

jd

jessica drake’s Guide To Wicked Sex: Anal Play for Men Stills

Every man wants to know but few are brave enough to ask. If you are curious about anal play for men, but don’t know where to start, this movie is for you. Wicked Pictures and resident sex educator jessica drake present the next installation in the award winning educational series, “jessica drake’s Guide to Wicked Sex:Anal Play for Men” With candid interviews and informative demonstrations, we will guide you to bigger, better, explosive orgasms, courtesy of your “P Spot”. From tongues to toys to strap-on sex and more, you’ll find everything you and your partner need to make sure the experience is mind blowing. Also included are three hardcore sex scenes that can be viewed for inspiration-without the educational commentary.

Link: Guide to Wicked Sex: Anal Play for Men

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Ask jessica- jessica drake Answers Reader’s Questions

My lover and I have started having anal sex, but I’m always paranoid about hygiene. Do you have any tips to get that area ready?

–Megan; Austin, TX

Hi Megan, I’m so glad you and your lover are expanding your sex life. There are a few steps you can try weeks ahead of time to be ready for anal sex, or some preparation steps right before the act, if you’re trying to be spontaneous.

A popular way to prepare if you have the time is to change your diet a bit. Try eating less fatty foods, and no huge meals. Keep in mind it usually takes 24 – 72 hours for most food to pass through your body. It takes 6 – 8 hours for food to pass through your stomach and small intestine, and then at least 24 hours to pass through the largeintestine.

If you’re planning on light anal stimulation with no penetration, then concentrate on washing the area very thoroughly with a mild soap and water. Make sure to skip the fancy soaps to avoid irritation. Also, as you’re having a shower, or a bath, if you kneel down into a squat and spread your legs, it will make shaving that little area so much easier, and you’ll be smooth and sweet smelling!

For full anal sex, you may consider doing an enema before the act. An enema is the process of cleaning the rectum with a bulb syringe or an enema bottle. It’s important to use a regular water enema (lukewarm or slightly warm), but not one that acts as a laxative. If you’ve never used an enema before, try a practice run before you do one for anal sex. Once you have it down, you can do an enema 2-3 hours before sex.

Keep in mind, it is not for the squeamish; it is anal sex after all. Make sure you are comfortable with your body and the way it functions. The key to great anal sex is being mentally ready as much as you are physically.

Now that you are prepared with the right information, you’re ready to go! Remember to relax, go slow and ease into it, use plenty of lube, and enjoy. For more information, check out jessica drake’s Guide to Wicked Sex: Anal.

xo,

jd

 

My husband and I don’t seem to communicate well about sex or our relationship in or outside of the bedroom. How can I change this?

–Amy; Wichita, KS

Hi Amy, I’m so happy you reached out for help. This is a common issue for a lot of couples, which can lead to dissolution of the relationship if never properly addressed.

Communication plays a huge role in successful relationships, sexual or otherwise. You need to discuss how to express your sexuality: what works for you, how to ask your partner what works for them, and how to navigate some of the potential communication pitfalls and insecurities. Communication exercises, both on your own, as well as with your partner, are great ways to build that confidence and bond.

A simple exercise borrowing itself from the concept of “daily affirmations” is to sit with your partner and share 5 things you like about each other. Another exercise, which can take relationship communication to the next level, can be aided with the use of props such as flash cards. By looking through a series of descriptive words, and selecting which words you are comfortable with, you can share with your partner the words you prefer he or she use in relation to how they describe you. (An important thing to note about this exercise is how you can express to your partner why certain words work well for you.)

Starting with these exercises will open up the lines of communication and intimacy between you and your partner. There are plenty of more advanced communication exercises you can do with your partner, as well as great workshops and classes. I would recommend searching online to see what is in your area. Good luck, have fun, and remember to enjoy yourselves!

xo,

jd

 

Mutual Masturbation: How to Still Have Sex When You’re Exhausted!

We’ve all been there. Long days at work, meetings that never seem to end, grocery lists that need taking care of – and of course, your beautiful, supportive and wonderful partner also wants to be tended to, and by the way, so do you! So what happens when you’re both absolutely exhausted, but still have a fire lit inside of you?

A great way to connect with your partner and yourself is mutual masturbation. Guys LOVE seeing a girl give herself pleasure, and what better (and more effective) way is there to get some when you’re oh-so-tired?  It can be close, wet and slow, or hot and fast.  Either way, mutual masturbation is a great way to get in touch with yourself and your body, which is always a turn-on for him.

Here are some great ways to get you and your partner prepped for your satisfaction guaranteed session:

  • Start with a shower to get relaxed, clean, and in the mood for each other.  Want to up the ante by lathering each other up? Score. Get him nice and excited for you. Kissing and massaging in the shower always works to get the engines started.
  • Get into bed first, while he’s drying off, and have some lube ready. Start caressing and pleasuring yourself in a way that is most pleasing to you. Make sure you have enough lube on your hand for him as well. Feel free to start stroking his cock while you stroke and rub yourself in front of him.
  • Try lying back from time to time, and let him take over; just relax and receive. Letting him turn you on and help you to climax may be all he needs to get going and reach orgasm as well.
  • Make sure you include some spooning, cuddling, and kissing.  If there are sexual hot spots – like nipples, or playing with his balls – tease them while your partner is pleasuring himself. Have him hold you close while you’re masturbating as well. These are always sure-fire ways to ignite the sexual fire, and maintain intimacy during your mutual masturbation session.

Also, keep these things in mind when you’re initiating a mutual masturbation session:

  • Always check in with your partner. A simple touch on the leg, backrub, or kiss on the back of the neck can help get things going.
  • Your lover may be just as tired and exhausted, but still hot and bothered, as you are. Remember that you know them, and they know you! You know how to turn each other on. Use what you know, and keep communicating, to help your partner get where they need to go. You might also find out a new spot that turns him on, or a new way to please him manually or orally later, when you’re watching him take care of himself.
  • Be your confident, sexy, alluring self. That means sometimes, it might not result in anything more than falling asleep in each other’s arms before orgasm. But remember – once you and your partner wake up from your nap, you’ll both be stimulated from your earlier play, which will just extend your lovemaking session! Languish in the sweet bliss of napping and pick up where you left off once you’re awake.

There will always be time for sex, even if it’s not penetrative or acrobatic. The important thing is to remember your connection, and how much your partner turns you on, even when the days are too long, the laundry piles are too high, and the boss’ demands are never-ending.

The sexiest thing at the end of the day is trust, communication, and intimacy. Have fun, experiment, and get cozy with your lover!

xo,

jd

Sex Positions – Doggy Will Make You Beg for More

As I’ve previously mentioned, altering your positions in the bedroom is one of the easiest ways to recapture the romantic spark.  The most basic of positions can be changed slightly to provide different sensations and orgasms.  There are even ways to modify the doggy position, which is one of my all time favorites.

 

Though doggy style is considered a male dominant position, a benefit for women is the ability to push back against the man’s thrusts, as well as control over grinding motions on the man’s penis.  Men have the advantage of a great view, plus they get both hands free for all sorts of enjoyable activities, from holding his lover’s waist to rubbing her clitoris, or even pulling her hair or spanking her… if she’s into that sort of sex play.

 

The first way to modify doggy is by the man pulling the woman up towards him, so her back is close to vertical.  This frees up her hands, while allowing the man the opportunity to pull her close.  The angle of penetration is very different here – not as deep as regular doggy style.

 

Alternatively, when the woman is slightly bent over face down in doggy, she isn’t supporting her body quite as much and is able to easily stimulate her clitoris or his testicles.  It also gives her the opportunity to incorporate the use of sex toys on herself or her partner.

 

A completely flat doggy style provides an amazing feeling.  The woman can now squeeze her legs together to increase the friction and tightness.  This in turn forces her pubic bone and clitoris down, allowing for grinding.

 

For those with the desire to try something more acrobatic, there is the wheelbarrow doggy.  In this position, the woman starts off on all fours on the edge of the bed.  As her lover enters her from behind, he raises her legs to wrap them around his waist.  He is now able to control the angle and the depth of penetration.  This requires more upper body strength from the man, but can also be a great substitute for going to the gym.

 

The doggy position can also travel off the bed.  The standing doggy is great for sex in the shower or during a quickie in public.  Couples can experiment with putting one of the woman’s legs up.  This position allows for increased clitoral stimulation and gives the man a great view.

 

Standing doggy style can also be accomplished with the woman on both of her legs, but bending over something, like a desk or the back of a couch.  This variation provides a feeling of submission some women are very fond of.  It’s also a great way for the man to hold his hips in place for a nice, rhythmic, dependable thrusting.  The woman can spread her legs far apart or hold them close together to change the feeling.

 

While doggy style is commonly associated as the go-to position for anal sex (for a good reason), it is also a fantastic way to stimulate the clitoris and the vagina in a multitude of ways and degrees.  Doggy may not offer the intimacy of the missionary position by being face-to-face, but there’s plenty of time to mix in both positions during sex.

 

For more variations and visuals on the doggy position, as well as detailed account of other positions, please consider viewing Guide to Wicked Sex: Basic Positions.

 

XO,

jd