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Slip of the Tongue

November 18, 2011 by 1 Comment

“I accidentally called my girlfriend my ex’s name in bed. Wtf do I do now?”   -anon. 27

Real Guy says:

Wow, is your passport up to date? Just kidding.  Assuming your gf is in your age range, the best explanation is that a slip of the tongue is natural, especially if your breakup was fairly recent. We get into habits, and those habits take time to break. In the heat of passion, frequently the mouth speaks before the brain processes. If your current girl is taking it real personally, it’s gonna cost you. Treat her to her favorite dinner or a spa day, along with a lot of reassurance that she’s the only one in your life. I’ve been on both ends of this event, and each time I was able to laugh it off. Good thing my partner was equally understanding.

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Sex on the First Date?

November 11, 2011 by Leave a Comment

“It’s the age-old question… How long do I wait before I have sex with a new guy I’m dating? Do guys really think less of girls that have sex on the first date?”   -Ellie, 22

Real Guy says:

The length of time should depend on your view of sex. If you look at sex as a purely physical act, which gets better as emotion becomes attached, then I say, “go for it”. If sex is more meaningful, then it’s best to wait until you’re ready, regardless of what his little head makes his big head say in the heat of passion. However, there are guys who will wait no longer than x number of dates, and if the sex hasn’t happened, they move on. Guys will wonder if you don’t like sex, and this is a sign of what’s to come. Even worse, they may think you’re holding out just so they’ll spend huge amounts of money first. As to your last question, guys call girls back because they like them personally. If you’ve had sex and the phone doesn’t ring, he wasn’t all that into you, or wasn’t interested in a relationship. You’ve probably heard this before, but at 22, a serious relationship isn’t something you should be interested in. You have many things to get out of your system (school, career, travel, friends, etc.), and statistically speaking, the odds that the next guy you have sex with will be your true “forever guy”, are astronomically against you. Best to play the odds.

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Truth in Advertising

November 4, 2011 by 1 Comment

“What do men look for in an online dating profile? I’m new to this, and I don’t want to screw it up.”  -Christine, 40

Real Guy says:

The first thing I look at are photos, and they should be recent. If you don’t have any, have a friend take them for you. Include flattering poses, and at least one full length. No sense trying to deceive someone here, because he’ll know the truth as soon as you meet. Next, I look at the number of children involved, and whether a woman wants more. If you want kids (or more kids), be proud of your choice, and say so in the profile. If the potential mate doesn’t want kids, better to find out now than in six months. Lastly, I look at interests. There are some things I want to do with a partner, and some I can do or prefer to do, alone. Treat your profile like a job interview…for life. Present yourself in a positive light, brag a little, and keep the negatives to a minimum. Read a few profiles of women similar to you in looks, and ask yourself, “Is this someone I’d want to meet”? If so, why? Take a few notes. Good luck!

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Once a cheater, always a cheater?

October 28, 2011 by 2 Comments

“I met my wife when she was dating someone else. She cheated on him with me. We’ve been married for 3 years, and now I think she’s seeing someone on the side. Do you believe in the saying “once a cheater, always a cheater”? How can I tell for sure?”  -Marcos, 33

Real Guy says:

Personally Marcos, I think you’re asking this question three years too late. But since we can’t jump into a time machine, let’s address your concerns. What’s making you think she’s cheating? Has she changed her routine, lost weight, or bought clothes when she normally doesn’t? Has her sex drive cooled drastically? Does she stay up late on the computer or texting on her phone? If you just have a “feeling”, I wouldn’t call the divorce lawyer just yet. If you’re trying to catch her cheating, or gather evidence, there are many things you can do. You can put a GPS tracker on her car, a keystroke recording program on her computer, or (if you have a lot of money) hire a detective. If you insist on catching her, a visit to your local spy store, or one online, will give you more ideas. I’ve always looked at it much simpler; If I thought someone was cheating, I didn’t need to prove it. To me, the relationship was broken and it was time to move on. Once I no longer trust a woman, I don’t need to spend my hard-earned money to justify leaving.

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The ‘Big O’

October 21, 2011 by 19 Comments

“I never orgasm from intercourse, only from a vibrator or when I play with myself, occasionally from oral sex, but never when my boyfriend and I are having sex. He always gets upset and thinks that he’s doing something wrong. What should I do/tell him?”   -Julie,26

Real Guy says:

Sex is about two things for a man; his orgasm, and his ability to make you orgasm. Most men won’t consider sex satisfactory unless both of you cross the finish line. Is his technique top-notch? In other words, have you climaxed with others? If so, he might want to consider some type of self-help video or book. After all, nobody is born with the ability to get a woman off. You might also want to give your bf control of the vibrator when you have sex. Explain that not all women climax the same way. Just as some women are loud, and others are more controlled, some women take longer than others to orgasm (sometimes a LOT longer, by the way). Either way, if your bf has the vibrator, he will regain some semblance of control when it comes to your orgasm.

 

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Three-Way Question

October 14, 2011 by 1 Comment

“My husband wants to have a threesome with me and one of my friends, and I think I may be open to it, but I also want to have a threesome…with two guys. He could be involved, or he could watch. I think that’s an even trade. How do I bring that up?”   – Mindi,32

Real Guy Says:

Threesomes are extremely tricky, and have been known to kill relationships. There’s a myriad of reasons:

  • You do it for your husband, but then he backs out of the deal.
  • One of you discovers you’re really into it, but the other isn’t. What then?
  • Jealousy can weave its way into the relationship, without warning.

Here’s the deal. It takes a very strong couple to survive sex outside the marriage. But if you’re hell-bent to do this, I highly recommend not using your friend. Better to use someone who’s a stranger, just so if it does cause some jealousy, you don’t ruin a friendship along with your marriage. As for how to bring up having your own threesome, next time he asks you, reply with, “And what do I get in return”? He’ll probably ask what you want, and that’s when you suggest your reward. Many times a guy is just testing his partner’s “lesbian-meter”, but backs off once he pictures you making it with two men, especially if he’s an insecure type.

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