Hi jessica, thank you for answering my question. I have a pretty good sex life with my husband of 10 years. We are lucky enough to be going on our second honeymoon this spring to a romantic cottage in the Bahamas. What can I do to turn the heat up and blow his mind? Ashleigh, 41, Atchison, Kansas
First of all, congrats. Ten years is a great milestone, and what better way to celebrate with a second honeymoon, without all the stress of planning a wedding right beforehand, and in the Bahamas, no less!
Because this is your tenth year of wedded bliss, you guys are very comfortable with each other…maybe a little TOO comfortable. This is your chance to shake things up a bit, and hopefully he has plans up his sleeve as well. The first step is packing for such an adventure. Here are some things that you might want to include:
“Sizzling hot packing list”
very high heels
a jersey of his favorite sports team
his “fantasy” outfit- something that you know really gets him going
lube. lots of lube.
a few porn DVDs- lots of resorts will be able to offer you a DVD player.
toys- vibrators with extra batteries, a blindfold, some massage oil
an iPod with great songs for striptease/seduction/sex along with mini speakers
scarves for bondage
The items listed above are a great starting point, you’ll want to personalize the list according to what you guys are into…or what you may want to try. It might be fun to visit an adult store together before your trip, or you could surprise him and just tuck the extra “sex bag” in with your luggage. And don’t be embarrassed about airport security- trust me, they’ve seen far more shocking things. (hey, i fly a lot, remember?)
Once you are there, allow yourself a little time to settle in and relax. Once it sinks in that the two of you are ALONE with no distractions in a gorgeous tropical location, do what comes naturally! Shed those clothes, slip into a bathing suit, oil up, and get ready to soak up some rays…but right before you walk out the door, give your partner the best surprise blow job ever. That can set the tone for your entire trip.
As for the rest of your sensual getaway, here are a few suggestions to get you on your way:
give him a sexy lap dance to his favorite song(s), and then as you strip, slowly back away and head for the bedroom, leaving a trail of clothes for him to follow.
take a candlelit bath together with a bottle of wine. wash each other. afterwards, dry each other off and grab the massage oil!
watch an adult movie together and act out something you’ve always wanted to try
get dressed up separately, and “pick each other up” like strangers at the bar of your resort. Give him your extra room key and tell him to meet you upstairs in 10 minutes. wait for him in the bed, putting one of those vibrators you packed to good use.
make on night “all about him” and do anything he tells you to do (within reason) let him direct what you wear, what you take off, what you touch, what you don’t. this exchange of control will drive you both wild.
the next night, it’s your turn. now he’s at your beck and call.
Have breakfast in bed. don’t use silverware, and don’t feed yourself. only each other.
This is a great place to try something you’ve never dared to before- whether it’s anal sex, some bondage, you name it. Part of your planning this second honeymoon could involve you taking him out for a nice, romantic dinner, and telling him about something you’d like to do when you are in the Bahamas. This is also a really good way to start the foreplay from thousands of miles away and build anticipation for what’s to come. (pun intended)
Enjoy yourselves and each other. You’ve earned it!